Post by EDITED Video Greg on Oct 25, 2018 9:49:23 GMT -6
Link to the movie: Just pretend the DCA logo is there.
Experiment G08: Plan 9 From Outer Space
{The intro starts}
Singers: In the not too different present,
2018.
There was a guy named Honstlar,
Slightly odder than you or me.
He ruled the Broternal Order,
Just another face with a horned bowler.
They were bored while surfing the channels one day,
When they decided to rip-off Mystery Science Theater 3K.
We'll watch some cheesy movies,
And whatever else we find. (La, la, la.)
We're gonna sit and watch them all,
As we slowly lose our minds. (La, la, la.)
Now keep in mind, he doesn't know how the movies will start or end. (La, la, la.)
He'll try to keep his sanity with the help of his hat-wearing friends.
BRO/SIS ROLL CALL
Newdean (I record)
Coach E (somehow here)
EVG (built like a funnel)
STOOOOM - (cutting off before Stom says anything) and these guys too [showing SMRX and GDF] (The originals)
If your wondering what he eats or drinks, and other science crap, (La, la, la.)
Then repeat to yourself "It's just a script, I should really just relax!"
For Broternal Helmet Theater G000!
(Twang.)
{The reversed door sequence happens and we see Greg wearing a grey shirt that says "TIME FOR GO TO BED!".}
EVG: Hi everyone, welcome to the Video Dungeon, I'm Greg Dando, A.K.A. The BIGGEST Tor Johnson Fan EVER. The reason why I'm telling you this is because today's movie is the Ed Wood classic, Plan 9 From Outer Space!
Honstlar: That's right, my bromide, and you can thank today's sponsor for providing the rights!
EVG: What sponsor?
Honstlar: THE PUBLIC DOMAIN!
I know how it goes with this movie. Are we gonna have to wait a long time at a Chinese Resturaunt only to get hot dogs at the theater instead?
I have no idea what you're talking about.
Oh, come on! You don’t know your classic Seinfeld? Kids these days I swear.
Don't blame me! That made no sense out of context.
You don't make sense out of context.
Nothing makes sense!
Everything makes sense!!
FEW THINGS MAKE SENSE!!!
{The lights flash.}
MOVIE SIGN!!!!
{Door sequence then we see a card that says "A Distributors Corporation of America Release".}
I knew that Disney's California Adventure was involved in this trainwreck somehow!
{We then see a silhouette of a man with beams of light behind him and text that says "Criswell Predicts"}
Criswell Predicts All!
You will die someday.
SUCH WISDOM!
{The silhouette is revealed.}
Criswell: Greetings my friends, we are all interested in the future.
Tell that to the Amish.
Criswell: ...For that is where you and I are going to spend the rest of our lives.
Uh, yeah, coexisting with that new Thundercats? I'd rather stay at this moment in time.
{The camera zooms in on Criswell.}
Criswell: And remember my friend, future events such as these will affect you in the future.
But will they affect the future of the future?
{Impersonating Criswell} You bet your future.
CRISWELL SEES ALL!
Criswell: You are interested in the unknown, the mysterious, the unexplainable. That is why you are here.
Aw yeah, a crappy conspiracy video!
Actually I'm more hoping it's a cryptid enthusiast movie.
Criswell: And now, for the first time, we are bringing to you the full story of what happened on that fateful day.
{as Criswell} ...my butt went psycho.
Criswell: We are giving you all the evidence, based only on the secret testimonies of the miserable souls who survived this terrifying ordeal.
Miserable is an understatement.
Criswell: The incidents, the places, my friends we cannot keep this a secret any longer.
Trust me, we're not friends.
Criswell: Let us punish the guilty, let us reward the innocent. My friend, can your heart stand the shocking facts about-
{Impersonating Mr. Plinkett.} My spastic colon.
{Lightning strike as we cut to a tombstone with "Tor Johnson" written on it}
TIME FOR GO TO INTRO!
Is this gonna be a running ga-
Yes.
{Fade to another tombstone with "Vampira" written on it, and another that says "Tom Keene"}
So that's what he did before Spongebob.
Commander Keen was on Spongebob?
{Fade to a title screen that says Plan 9 from Outer Space}
New! From the makers of Plan 8 from Inner My Grandparents House.
{Fade to a screen that reads "Co-Starring Dudley Manlove" and "Mona McKinnon".}
Let the jokes at Dudley's expense begin.
It's funny cause his name's Ralph- I mean Manlove!
{Quickly cut to a live action shot of John Goodman wearing a crown.}
King Ralph: Look, how many times do I have to remind you that I'm the king and my name is Ralph?
{Cut back to the theater.}
Let's just pretend that didn't happen.
{Another card fades in saying "With Guest Stars Bella Lugosi John Breckinridge Lyle Talbot".}
Guest stars?
(Impersonating Kermit) It's the Muppet Show with our very special guest stars: A bunch of corpses. YAAAAY!
Experiment G08: Plan 9 From Outer Space
{The intro starts}
Singers: In the not too different present,
2018.
There was a guy named Honstlar,
Slightly odder than you or me.
He ruled the Broternal Order,
Just another face with a horned bowler.
They were bored while surfing the channels one day,
When they decided to rip-off Mystery Science Theater 3K.
We'll watch some cheesy movies,
And whatever else we find. (La, la, la.)
We're gonna sit and watch them all,
As we slowly lose our minds. (La, la, la.)
Now keep in mind, he doesn't know how the movies will start or end. (La, la, la.)
He'll try to keep his sanity with the help of his hat-wearing friends.
BRO/SIS ROLL CALL
Newdean (I record)
Coach E (somehow here)
EVG (built like a funnel)
STOOOOM - (cutting off before Stom says anything) and these guys too [showing SMRX and GDF] (The originals)
If your wondering what he eats or drinks, and other science crap, (La, la, la.)
Then repeat to yourself "It's just a script, I should really just relax!"
For Broternal Helmet Theater G000!
(Twang.)
{The reversed door sequence happens and we see Greg wearing a grey shirt that says "TIME FOR GO TO BED!".}
EVG: Hi everyone, welcome to the Video Dungeon, I'm Greg Dando, A.K.A. The BIGGEST Tor Johnson Fan EVER. The reason why I'm telling you this is because today's movie is the Ed Wood classic, Plan 9 From Outer Space!
Honstlar: That's right, my bromide, and you can thank today's sponsor for providing the rights!
EVG: What sponsor?
Honstlar: THE PUBLIC DOMAIN!
I know how it goes with this movie. Are we gonna have to wait a long time at a Chinese Resturaunt only to get hot dogs at the theater instead?
I have no idea what you're talking about.
Oh, come on! You don’t know your classic Seinfeld? Kids these days I swear.
Don't blame me! That made no sense out of context.
You don't make sense out of context.
Nothing makes sense!
Everything makes sense!!
FEW THINGS MAKE SENSE!!!
{The lights flash.}
MOVIE SIGN!!!!
{Door sequence then we see a card that says "A Distributors Corporation of America Release".}
I knew that Disney's California Adventure was involved in this trainwreck somehow!
{We then see a silhouette of a man with beams of light behind him and text that says "Criswell Predicts"}
Criswell Predicts All!
You will die someday.
SUCH WISDOM!
{The silhouette is revealed.}
Criswell: Greetings my friends, we are all interested in the future.
Tell that to the Amish.
Criswell: ...For that is where you and I are going to spend the rest of our lives.
Uh, yeah, coexisting with that new Thundercats? I'd rather stay at this moment in time.
{The camera zooms in on Criswell.}
Criswell: And remember my friend, future events such as these will affect you in the future.
But will they affect the future of the future?
{Impersonating Criswell} You bet your future.
CRISWELL SEES ALL!
Criswell: You are interested in the unknown, the mysterious, the unexplainable. That is why you are here.
Aw yeah, a crappy conspiracy video!
Actually I'm more hoping it's a cryptid enthusiast movie.
Criswell: And now, for the first time, we are bringing to you the full story of what happened on that fateful day.
{as Criswell} ...my butt went psycho.
Criswell: We are giving you all the evidence, based only on the secret testimonies of the miserable souls who survived this terrifying ordeal.
Miserable is an understatement.
Criswell: The incidents, the places, my friends we cannot keep this a secret any longer.
Trust me, we're not friends.
Criswell: Let us punish the guilty, let us reward the innocent. My friend, can your heart stand the shocking facts about-
{Impersonating Mr. Plinkett.} My spastic colon.
{Lightning strike as we cut to a tombstone with "Tor Johnson" written on it}
TIME FOR GO TO INTRO!
Is this gonna be a running ga-
Yes.
{Fade to another tombstone with "Vampira" written on it, and another that says "Tom Keene"}
So that's what he did before Spongebob.
Commander Keen was on Spongebob?
{Fade to a title screen that says Plan 9 from Outer Space}
New! From the makers of Plan 8 from Inner My Grandparents House.
{Fade to a screen that reads "Co-Starring Dudley Manlove" and "Mona McKinnon".}
Let the jokes at Dudley's expense begin.
It's funny cause his name's Ralph- I mean Manlove!
{Quickly cut to a live action shot of John Goodman wearing a crown.}
King Ralph: Look, how many times do I have to remind you that I'm the king and my name is Ralph?
{Cut back to the theater.}
Let's just pretend that didn't happen.
{Another card fades in saying "With Guest Stars Bella Lugosi John Breckinridge Lyle Talbot".}
Guest stars?
(Impersonating Kermit) It's the Muppet Show with our very special guest stars: A bunch of corpses. YAAAAY!