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Post by Gfdgsgxgzgdrc on Jun 7, 2020 15:25:23 GMT -6
Hey, it's the Bendini sisters. Stop crashing on people, Cassandra.
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Post by Honstlar on Jun 8, 2020 18:02:46 GMT -6
Is no one else concerned that a giant meteor has crushed Dooble?
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Post by Gfdgsgxgzgdrc on Jun 9, 2020 15:54:32 GMT -6
{Everyone speaks simultaneously.} Nah. Nope. I mean, not really. Not in the least. Nopers! I'm not. Ehh. Oh, okay then. 'Cause I'm not really concerned either. {They all walk away, leaving Dooble behind.} My spleen feels like a thousand nails.
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Post by Gfdgsgxgzgdrc on Nov 10, 2020 23:58:30 GMT -6
{They keep walking until they come upon a castle.} Hey, look, it wasn't stock footage after all. {A miniature Grindolo steps out, accompanied by the Pretender (a baby head in a large robot suit), Mr. Dando (a 20-year-old grown man), and the Cleanser Geek (a scribble).} Hi, friends! This is my castle. Have you come to play? No, you're weird. Aw, that's mean. We're enemies now! {Cut to the modern-day gang watching the footage.} This is entirely inaccurate. We didn't meet Grindolo until we were at least five. And he wasn't on the moon until we banished him there. Yeah, totally. I don't remember any of this either. Does anyone know why Grindolo is in our meeting? Hey, I'm in this clearly noncanonical children's cartoon show too. You guys aren't the only ones who want to relive fake youthful memories. I'll allow it. Just don't kill anyone, okay? No promises. {Cut back to the show. Honstlar and Grindolo are swinging their arms at each other angrily.} I'll punch out your teeth, you disrespectful infant! Jokes on you, I haven't grown in my teeth yet! Goo. You know what, Imaginater, you're right. We're all within the age range of 1 to 300, we should all just get along. Come in, we'll have a pretend tea party or something. Ooh, pretend tea is my favorite! As long as it's got a real spoon. The honey should be half-pretend, though.
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amberite
Acolyte
Almighty Waitress/Janitor
wowie! good movie
Posts: 11
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Post by amberite on Jul 5, 2021 14:38:25 GMT -6
I suppose now I'll get everything set up for these kids' visit. Get inside, everyone. {Mr. Dando walks inside first, then everyone else walks in. Cut to the inside of the castle.} What do we do while that guy gets our pretend tea?
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Post by Gfdgsgxgzgdrc on Jul 11, 2021 18:41:43 GMT -6
Let us partake in a battle of dark sorcery. Or we could stack blocks to make a castle. Why make a castle out of blocks when you already live in a real castle? I'd be down for the dark sorcery thing. {stacking blocks on top of each other} Too late, already started building. Goo. You're right, Imaginater, the law of structural redundancy dictates statistical indetermination. {rearranges the blocks}
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Post by Honstlar on May 23, 2022 17:25:47 GMT -6
(Emits a horrible buzzing sound) She said she doesn't approve of the shape of your castle
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Post by Gfdgsgxgzgdrc on May 26, 2022 22:48:50 GMT -6
Well, that can be rearranged. {SRMX12 rearranges the blocks to form a giant golden statue of baby Cleanser Geek.} {ecstatic buzzing} How did you do that? With our imaginations, you unimaginative swine. WHAT did you just call me?! Why did I get the feeling that a 30+ year history of rivalry and archnemesisry began just now?
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Post by Honstlar on May 26, 2022 23:19:59 GMT -6
{Cut back to modern-day Honstlar} Because this whole thing is just a lie thought up by Stom after bribing some animation studio into making this weird alternate history fan-fic! I mean, Stom, who as we all know is a known habitual liar, would have made sure that his lies were backed up by weird 80's cartoons rather than actual evidence! This is just a total con job to trick everyone into believing the lie of the evil empire's invincibility! We can't let them implant the salmon into our brains! Everything is connected!! DOUBT EVERYONE BUT MEEEEE!!!!! {Greg slaps Honstlar with a salmon that has a post-it note reading "Trooth" attached to it.} Thanks, Brother Greg. I- I needed that. {Cut back to the show.}
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Post by Gfdgsgxgzgdrc on Jun 4, 2022 0:18:37 GMT -6
You'll pay for your rudeness! Take THIS! {Grindolo holds up a baby rattle as a wand and fires a spell at Honstlar, who has no reaction.} What was that supposed to be? I'm only 300 years old, I haven't perfected my dark magic yet. Cut me some slack! Spit up mashed carrots at him! That'll teach him to disrespect his elders! No way, that's gross. Plus, you're only like a month older than him.
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Post by Honstlar on Jun 5, 2022 1:19:43 GMT -6
{Quietly} I'll show you what's a month older than him... What was that? Nothing- I mean, Goo!
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Post by Gfdgsgxgzgdrc on Jun 14, 2022 21:39:24 GMT -6
We have no time for such petty squabbles among our own team. We need to focus on revenge against these intruders! Oh yeah? Not if we make our own team and stop you first! What should we be called? The Infantile Nursery of Bibs and Bonnets? Yeah, that's perfect! At least for the next couple years or so! {Cut to the modern-day BODH meeting.} ...And so begins the story of us hating each other's guts, at least within the canon of this made-up children's show. Yep. Such nostalgic, fake memories. So, uh, you gonna leave our headquarters now? I was kinda hoping to kill at least a couple of you before I was kicked out. So, I should probably get to that. I'd appreciate if you didn't do that. Tough beans. {points at members of the BODH} Eenie, meenie, miney... yeah, that one. {pointing at Honstlar} You're supposed to go up to "moe"! And there's, like, several more lines after that! Yeah, but I just felt like killing Honstlar today. Tough beans. {A portal opens, and the Infantile Nursery of Bibs and Bonnets walks out.}BABY HONSTLAR: Oh yeah? Not if we defeat you first! Um, can anyone explain how this is possible? I'm not surprised at this point, this kind of thing happens all the time.
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Post by Honstlar on Jun 15, 2022 0:34:38 GMT -6
Ha! Do you really think that you bunch of drooling babies can defeat a millennia old cosmic warlock? Baby Honstlar: No, but we do know who can... {A giant foot crushes Grindolo.} Baby Honstlar: Nanny's burly ex-boyfriend from her bad girl phase!
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Post by Gfdgsgxgzgdrc on Jun 16, 2022 22:14:04 GMT -6
{voiceover} MONTY PYTHON'd! Ow, any ounce of dignity I once might've had! BABY HONSTLAR: Man, for a guy named Grindolo, he really doesn't grin a whole lot. BABY GFD: Yeah, more like Grimdolo, am I right? BABY COACH E: What even is a dolo, and why is it grin? BABY GREG: Uh, it might be an acronym. Do Only Live Once? BABY GFD: Dill Olives Left Outside, duh. I think the more important question is how you guys got here. I mean, I've seen some time travel in my day, but you guys never even existed! What gives?
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Post by Honstlar on Jun 21, 2022 13:42:58 GMT -6
Baby Honstlar: Uhh..... BABIES, RETREAT!
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Post by Gfdgsgxgzgdrc on Jun 21, 2022 22:11:45 GMT -6
{The babies vanish.} So did that actually happen, or was it just a figment of our collective imaginations? Wouldn't you like to know! {winks at the camera as the scene irises out}{The word "The End" appears in the Honstlar Babies title font.}
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Post by Honstlar on Jun 21, 2022 23:04:57 GMT -6
{Honstlar pushes the black away.} Oh no, ya don't!
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Post by Gfdgsgxgzgdrc on Jun 22, 2022 19:01:35 GMT -6
What are you talking about? That wrapped up so nicely. We found out the origins of our rivalry with Grindolo, then we met our baby selves and crushed Grindolo with a foot. No unresolved plot threads or unanswered questions at all! How did they get to our— No unanswered questions!
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Post by Honstlar on Jun 22, 2022 19:40:39 GMT -6
Reguardless, I'm not letting this episode end until either Stom admits he making this all up or his cockamamie cartoon finishes. Well, I'm definitely not making anything up, so keep watching the cartoon it is! {Cut back to Baby Grindolo.} Baby Grindolo: That name is awful, just like your chances of defeating us!
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Post by Gfdgsgxgzgdrc on Jun 23, 2022 23:43:47 GMT -6
...Wait, where'd they go? {The baby BODH returns through a portal.} Sorry, we were just defeating your future self. You were saying? Uh oh. Retreat!
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Post by Honstlar on Jun 24, 2022 1:04:22 GMT -6
{The bad guys rush into the castle, which grows a pair of human legs and runs away.} Well, that was strange. Nanny: {offscreen} What was strange? {The background suddenly changes to the nursery.} All: Wha? {Cut to Nanny. (Or at least, her legs.)} Nanny: I just went to the grocery store and now I find all of you standing around for no reason. {Cut to Baby Honstlar.} But- But- I could have sworn we were on the moon! Um, no we weren't. It was just our imagination. I was trying to tell you earlier, but you just thought I was talking about DVDs or whatever. I was? Boy, do I feel silly. {Everyone laughs.} What? I didn't tell a joke or anything, did I? {A tomato hits Baby Honstlar.} Huh, I guess I did. {Fade to black, then to the end credits} {Cut to Stom turning off the projector.}
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Post by Gfdgsgxgzgdrc on Jul 1, 2022 0:14:44 GMT -6
Gotta have the obligatory tomato gag! That alone proves this is real, right? But there were credits! WHY WOULD THERE BE CREDITS OF OUR BABY VIDEOS?! Ohhh, I think I see what happened. I lent out the rights to use our likeness for children's animated content to various television studios, and must've gotten that mixed up with my actual childhood. You lent out our intellectual property without our permission?! At least it cuts down on the amount of bootleg knockoffs. {Stom puts another video on the projector, animated in a Powered by The Cheat style. A miscolored Honstlar with a human nose and shirt reading "hawntslar" wanders onscreen.}HAWNTSLAR: Welcome, I'm a Hawntslar and weclome to our Brothers of the Mighty Hat! {More characters wander onscreen, each with obvious name tags.}GGGGXGDGFJGJ: You said it, Captain Hatleader! STOMP: I baked us all non-specific batter-based breakfast treat! GREDGE WHO EDITS THE MOVIES: Hooray for non-specific batter-based breakfast treat! NOT ZASCUB-NAMED PERSON: And human noses! {Cut back to the BODH.} I'd like to meet this Ggggxgdgfjgj guy. He seems super cool and way different from me. Yeah, I've had about enough of that discount knockoff nonsense. But what if they're the original? Have you ever considered... that we might be the knockoff? {Everyone laughs. A tomato is thrown at Gfd.} Oh. Well, I guess that confirms that we're the real deal. {Once again, the scene irises out, and "The End" appears in the Honstlar Babies title font.}
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Post by Honstlar on Jul 3, 2022 15:48:19 GMT -6
(Click on the "E" in "The End" to see an additional scene in the meeting room. There are two film cans and a projector on the table. Honstlar walks into frame.) Ugh, I can't believe Stom left all his stuff here. That guy is some kinda scatterbrained. (Pause.) Wait a minute, I don't remember seeing two film reels. (Honstlar peeks into one of the film cans.) AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!(Honstlar runs off. The lid of the can opens, revealing Baby Animal from Muppet Babies. Synth music is heard.) Baby Animal: Go bye-bye! (He laughs, and the screen fades to black)
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