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Post by Gfdgsgxgzgdrc on Jul 11, 2021 21:50:12 GMT -6
{Cut to a white void. Particles appear and join together, creating the Field. Gold portals open, and various characters walk out as the portals close.} Huh. The afterlife is less interesting than I expected. I don't think this is the afterlife... I think we've been resurrected. Oh good, being dead is a real nuisance. But... how are we alive? Why is our planet is back to normal? I thought Xar'ak's spells were permanent. While I was being eaten by that burger, Honstlar stayed behind to fight Xar'ak. He must've won. {typing} And created a new identical universe, by the looks of it. He created a universe? Yes, and according to my calculations... we're in it. That's amazing! How'd you do it, Honstlar? {Pause.} Honstlar? Where is he? Why isn't he here? He would likely be in the fabric of reality, if... if he hadn't destroyed our old universe, causing a cataclysm within, and... And what? Well... seeing as the universe we lived in no longer exists, it would seem that Honstlar is... no longer living. We have no proof of that! That's the logical conclusion. It's strongly implied by the available data. What about Grindolo? Was he brought back to life as well? {typing} It seems that he only brought back those who were killed in the battle against Xar'ak. Grindolo died several hours earlier than that. What about Grindolo's past self? The one Honstlar said redeemed himself and whatnot? Honstlar apparently fixed all changes to the timeline, which would mean that version of Grindolo no longer exists and, in a sense, never has. Hey, what happened to the Pillquarters? Oh yeah, I forgot to mention, Xar'ak expanded his base and destroyed our headquarters with it. Sorry. Aw, man! The planet's back to normal now, so why isn't his base gone? Honstlar removed all of Xar'ak's spells in this new universe, but I guess he didn't take real estate into account. With our Supreme Overlord gone... and our archnemesis... and our headquarters... is there any reason for the BODH to exist? I hate to admit it, but I can't imagine a BODH without Honstlar to overlord us supremely. He'll return, I know it! Perhaps he will, but for now, I think it's best for us to split up. To find our own path. But then who will I distribute waffles to? Whose waffles will I eat every half hour? Whose meatloaf will I fold in half? That's for you to figure out. See you later.
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Post by Gfdgsgxgzgdrc on Jul 12, 2021 13:56:29 GMT -6
{They depart and walk their separate ways. Cut to the Pretender and Mr. Dando.} Grindolo? Hey! Grindolooo! Where are you? {walks by} Oh, he's dead. W... what? Yeah, Xar'ak killed him. You didn't know that? He told me to check up on Mr. Dando's trombone practice, and the next thing I knew, the castle changed, and Xar'ak was here, and Grindolo was nowhere to be seen. But Grindolo was in that interdimensional battle, wasn't he? His past self, yeah, but the real Grindolo's still dead. Noooo!! Grindolo, why?! How will we stop the BODH now? Oh, you don't need to. Honstlar died, so we're not a thing anymore. {leaves} So... both Honstlar and Grindolo are dead. I guess there's not much reason to continue with our master's plans if he's not around. Yeah, we might as well follow the BODH's example. Split up for a while, do our own thing. See you around, Pretender. {They both walk away.} {muttering to himself} I can't believe it, but somehow... for some reason... I almost wish Honstlar was still alive. {Cut to Honstlar drifting through an ethereal void. He wakes up.} I'm still alive?!
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Post by Honstlar on Jul 15, 2021 13:28:55 GMT -6
I always figured the universe would go out with a bang, not with a cop-out!
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Post by Gfdgsgxgzgdrc on Jul 15, 2021 14:31:54 GMT -6
{He lands on a five-dimensional dodecahedron.} The Golden Fedora must've protected me from the universal cataclysm by sending me to some other dimension. That's pretty neat, except I don't know what this place is or how to get home. {A bizarre alien creature approaches, with 5,000 limbs and a face that shifts through different realities. Its several eyes blink in several periods of time simultaneously.}ALIEN: ạ̴͋͆▢̴̢̫͙͆q̶̼̩̑▣̸̻͓̀̃͑ͅ7̷̹̃;̸̹́͘◄̷̩̜͎̊́◓̷̟̈́̿͠Ŕ̶̼͔̣̒◺̷̣̩̎̽◞̷̻̻͔͂'̴̥͖̐̎͝◘̶͓̪̅͝ Hi, where can I find the nearest restroom? ALIEN: {folds itself inside out} ◴̴̰̙̠͐^̷̛̦̪̆%̷͎͓͐ĝ̵̼̬̒͝▤̷̥͂̒́▹̵̝͊&̷̱͗L̷͕͚̻͆̓{̵̜͍͗̓5̷͖̆◌̴̨̈̀͝ I have a feeling this dimension is going to take some getting used to.
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Post by Honstlar on Jul 15, 2021 16:48:23 GMT -6
(Cut to Homestar in the Office. He's wearing a headset and the brown polo from Biz Cas Fri.) All we need is the middle initials of your Wafesay Club Card and your cable box will be right as rain!
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Post by Gfdgsgxgzgdrc on Jul 17, 2021 16:12:29 GMT -6
{peering over the cubicle wall} Hi, I'm having trouble with my keyboard. Where's the spacebar? You'll have to ask Honstlar, he's the office spacebar expert. Oh, wait... It's okay, I forget sometimes too. Just like the location of the spacebar. Do you think maybe they're in the same place? Perhaps. I'll check other universes, see if any of them have a spacebar and/or a Honstlar. Yeah, you go do that. I sure do miss those helmet guys. {Cut to Gfd walking into a waffle restaurant.} Hi, I'll buy 27 tons of each flavor of waffles you've— STOM?! Gfd! Glad to see you coming by my restaurant. It's been so many weeks since we've seen each other! How's life been? I've been starting a business where people pay me to eat food. Hasn't been very successful so far. Well, keep trying. I heard Coach E has become a famous writer, Rabite's an artist, Greg's a costume designer and logo consultant... Yeah, everyone's living the dream. {sigh} Except Honstlar. Yep. I haven't heard anything about SRMX12, though... what's he been up to? {Cut to Xar'ak's base, the Pillquarters' debris still scattered around it. SRMX12 approaches it curiously. He holds up some blueprints, depicting a castle with a helmet at the top, then looks back at the base.}
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Post by Gfdgsgxgzgdrc on Aug 4, 2021 21:43:18 GMT -6
I could do it, but... {sigh} the BODH doesn't exist anymore, so what's the point? And besides, where would I get the money for it? {The King of Town (wearing an Anti-Sauce Joke Patch) and the Poopsmith walk up holding a giant check.} Excuse me, are you one of them helmeted fellows what saved the universe a few months ago? Well... not anymore, technically, but... um... {looks at his blueprints} I mean, yes. Yes, I am. To express our gratitude, Free Country, USA has elected to bestow you with a billion dollars. Don't spend it all in one place. {hands SRMX12 the check} Okay... {looks at the base} but what if I spend it all on one place? I'll allow it. Additionally, the Municipality will call upon you and your helmet brothers in times of trouble using this totally original and unique signal... {The king presses a button, and a light shines in the sky with a Viking helmet in the middle.} I hate to tell you this, but... we're not... we... {pauses and thinks for a moment} Okay, that's fine. I'd like to thank you as well. My several hours of torture at the hands of Xar'ak has given me time to reflect on life, and I've decided to break my vow of silence permanently. Good for you! Unfortunately, this means I'll lose a two-dollar bet with the Blacksmith, but I'll just work 24/7 for the rest of the year to make up for it. Actually, seeing as I have a billion dollars now, I could pay you instead. And in return... how are your construction and renovation skills? They're pretty good on the off-chance I get possessed by a video game character. Good, because I have a job for you. {Cut to Honstlar waking up in an extradimensional bed.} {yawn} Another day, another five thousand millenia. Man, time is weird here.
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Post by Gfdgsgxgzgdrc on Aug 14, 2021 21:55:43 GMT -6
{He walks down a Penrose-triangle-shaped flight of stairs and shatters a barrier of light. The shards reassemble as the spectrum of light encases him within, revealing several creatures inside.} {speaks bizarre alien language; subtitled} Hey ◴̴̰̙̠͐^̷̛̦̪̆%̷͎͓͐ĝ̵̼̬̒͝▤̷̥͂̒́, thanks again for letting me sleep at your place. ALIEN: {subtitled} It's no problem. Here, I made your favorite: subverted electrons, aged 10,000 eons in the depths of the eternal sea. {The alien gives Honstlar a transparent cube with glowy particles inside. Honstlar absorbs the cube.} {subtitled} Man, I wish the guys in my dimension could try this. ALIEN: {subtitled} Speaking of which, I forgot to ask... have you made any progress in your journey to find the dimensional artifacts? {subtitled} I searched both sides of the time breach, I even ventured into the forgotten realm, but nothing's turned up. I'm going to search some more. ALIEN: {subtitled} Good luck! Come back before millenium's end, lest you be consumed by the gargantuan beasts of ◄̷̩̜͎̊́◓̷̟̈́̿͠Ŕ̶̼͔̣̒◺̷̣̩̎̽◞̷̻̻͔͂ and the timeline-disrupting gaze of their twelve billion eyes. {subtitled} You say that every half-century. Don't worry, I know my way around.
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Post by Gfdgsgxgzgdrc on Sept 5, 2021 20:35:21 GMT -6
{Cut to Honstlar wandering through a thousand dimensions at once, along the shores of an imploding sea.} Dimensional artifacts... dimensional artifacts... {A rumbling is heard as the reality begins to collapse.} Aw man, has time reversed to the point of no return again? {Giant beasts enter through the cracks in reality, towering over the dimension with looming tentacles, their twelve billion eyes surveying the entire timeline.} {closes his eyes} Right, I can't look at these guys or they'll purge me from the timeline such that I'll have never existed. {pause} I mean, I am kind of curious about what they look like... {Honstlar looks up, and that moment the sky is blasted with a beam of pure ultraviolet light, and Honstlar is teleported to a gargantuan crystal palace.}VOICE: Honstlar. Who's that? Was I erased from time? VOICE: I saved you from the ◄̷̩̜͎̊́◓̷̟̈́̿͠Ŕ̶̼͔̣̒◺̷̣̩̎̽◞̷̻̻͔͂. I have sensed your desire to return to your home dimension. Yeah, I would very much like to go back there. By the way, how are you speaking English? VOICE: As the eternal guardian of this realm, it is my duty to keep watch over all adjacent universes, yours included. Here, take this dimensional artifact. It's not enough to return you to your universe, but it will lead you out of this one. Hopefully wherever you end up will be able to bring you home. {takes a crystal that continuously folds itself inside-out} Thanks, I've been looking for this! See ya later, omnipotent deity. {The crystal multiples, forming a glistening interdimensional wall. Honstlar walks through it, and ends up in a new universe. A sentient eyeball floats up to Honstlar.}EYEBALL: Gloobagloop? Well, this isn't much of an improvement. {Cut to SRMX12 and the Poopsmith at Xar'ak's base.}
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Post by Gfdgsgxgzgdrc on Sept 27, 2021 20:41:30 GMT -6
All right, paint job's done. But the castle's still looking a bit... sinister. Might wanna change that somehow. You want me to change the shape of the castle? To take the very foundation of this architecture and compromise its structural integrity? Do you really think it's that easy? I dunno, I was just thinking— Because you're right, it is that easy. I created the gold paint out of nanorobots that have been programmed to bond with the castle's atomic structure, so they can be rearranged with some basic programming. {SRMX12 types on the Prisma One. The castle shifts to a more cylindrical design, as a helmet grows on top.} That's amazing! Why didn't you tell me about this sooner?! I did. Your eyes glazed over as soon as I got to the part about the molecular bonding process. Oh yeah, now I remember. Your ceaseless technobabble instantly cured my insomnia. This shapeshifting functionality has countless potential applications! For example, remember how our last headquarters could transform into a vehicle? {SRMX12 continues typing, and wheels appear on the castle.} Behold, the Hatmobile! {walks onscreen} Is this supposed to be like the Pillmobile but, like, a helmet? {nervously} Oh, hi, Greg. Uh, this is just— Look, we rebuilt your headquarters! It's better than new! Yeah, that'd be great if we were still meeting at all. What do you mean? {to the Poopsmith} Yeah, I, uh, forgot to mention... the BODH isn't really a thing at the moment. So all those months of construction and painting were for nothing?! I just... I wanted to create something so I could take my mind off things. Then I thought, perhaps... maybe... if I rebuilt our headquarters, we could have meetings and go on adventures again. {sarcastically} Honstlar and Grindolo aren't around anymore, but sure, let's go on some adventures. We could embark on a perilous journey to the grocery store, or defeat the evil Blubb-O's combo meal... {sigh} You're right, it isn't realistic. I just wanted things to go back to normal, but... that doesn't seem like it'll ever happen. ROBOT VOICE: Exactly. From now on... {A Tappatok robot appears with a dramatic music sting.}TAPPATOK: Things will be very, very different.
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Post by Gfdgsgxgzgdrc on Oct 15, 2021 19:02:04 GMT -6
{Cut to Honstlar alone in a dreary purple dimension, the only light source being distant crystals in the pitch-black sky. His clothes are tattered and he has a full backpack and a patchy brown beard.} I really wish that Zarkonoid didn't eat my tent... this dimension gets cold at this time of night. {He takes a small device out of his backpack and presses a button, generating firewood in front of him.} And now some flint to create the sparks... {taps the device} Aw crap, it's out of energy. I gotta get back to dimension X-51R and recharge this thing. How am I gonna stay warm now? {An idea dawns on him. He shivers at the thought, or maybe just because it's cold. He takes a ball of purple dough out of his backpack and walks around.} Let's see... is there one here? {sniffs the air} Ah, this way. {Honstlar turns around and walks the other way. His steps become slow and cautious, then he stops.} Here it is. I can't believe I'm actually approaching one of these things, after spending three weeks hiding from 'em. {clears throat and holds up the ball of dough} Hey, Rawnthoq, I know you like Yewglyan munchensphere. Why don't you take it? {The invisible creature appears, letting go of its camouflage. It begins chasing Honstlar, who runs back to the firewood and eats the dough.} Whoops, I ate it. No worries, you can just eat me instead. {The creature breathes fire at Honstlar, who jumps away at the last second, lighting the firewood. As the creature closes in and unhinges its three jaws, Honstlar takes a makeshift bow-and-arrow out of his backpack and shoots the creature with an explosive material, killing it.} Might as well throw this into the fire. No sense in wasting a good Rawnthoq. {Cut to Honstlar later, sitting by the fire and eating Rawnthoq meat. He grimaces.} Man, the food here is terrible. Why'd I have to end up here for three weeks, and that lemon meringue pie dimension for only two? {sigh} Well, it's worth it if I get to see my friends again. What's it been, like, a year in their universe? {Honstlar chokes down the rest of the meat. He then takes an odd material out of his backpack and pours a chemical substance onto it, expanding it into a force field around him.} I may not have a tent, and this Y4O;S2Wian bubbular fluid may not last long, but at least it's something. {lies down and sleeps}{Fade to later. The force field is gone, and Honstlar wakes up.} {yawns} Well, it's way too early, but I should probably get up before I get eaten, turned inside out, or sent backwards and forwards through time simultaneously... again. {He looks up at the sky, the crystals glistening vibrantly.} At least I get to see what's basically this dimension's equivalent to a sunrise. {takes a map out of his pocket} All right, time to follow the 4th Dimensional Governor's directions... {mumbling to himself} Left at the dimensional barrier, northwest from the whirlpool of antimatter... yep, I went there... so if this is dimensional quadrant 43-C... then the portal should be two kilomiles east. {Cut to Honstlar arriving at a portal. He walks through it, finding a world with reversed gravity, filled with imploding orbs.} Aw man, the Forthlian dimension again?! This is the third time I've been here! Have I just been walking in interdimensional circles? {He sees his past self wandering through the orbs.} Oh, come on! I'm not only at the same place as before, but the same time as well? This is getting ridiculous. PAST HONSTLAR: Tell me about it. {Cut to Free Country, USA.}
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Post by Gfdgsgxgzgdrc on Dec 14, 2021 14:53:00 GMT -6
{Stom is making waffles in his restaurant. SRMX12 bursts in.} Stom! Do you have any robot-army-destroying waffles? Yeah, a couple. Why? 'Cause the world is kind of being taken over by a robot army. Tappatok? I thought it was destroyed. They must've backed up their technology onto an external hard drive, then double-encrypted it so we wouldn't locate its data. You sure that's how technology works? Fairly certain. All right, I'll get the robot-army-destroying waffles. {chewing} The what? Gfd. Always have to force yourself into a joke with an inconvenient snacktime at the last second, don't you? I thought these were the immortal-monster-sealing-away-in-another-dimension waffles. I need to start labeling these things. That's okay, we can find other ways to stop them. Stom, make more waffles. Gfd, eat as many robots as you can. All of them, or just the mustard-flavored ones? I didn't know any of them were mustard-flavored. I mean, I'd assume so. Who'd just make plain robots without a mustard variety? I would like to leave this conversation at my earliest convenience. Which is right now. I'll see if I can get the rest of the gang to help. {leaves} Tell them I called dibs on the mustard-flavored ones!
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Post by Gfdgsgxgzgdrc on Feb 9, 2022 19:08:53 GMT -6
{Cut to Tappatok robots taking over the countryside, making everything white and blocky.}TAPPATOK #2967: At last, the perfect world we've strived for is at hand. Flawless. Orderly. Robotic. {Sume smashes the robot with her mop.}TAPPATOK #8105: Oh great, now we have to conserve expenses for unit 2967's funeral. All units concentrate energy on exterminating the rebels. {The rest of the BODH (with the exception of Honstlar) charges toward the robots, prepared for battle.}{EDITED Video Greg draws a laser gun sword beam in his magic sketchbook, but is tackled by robots.} Greg! Your book! {Rabite attempts to grab the sketchbook, but her efforts are stopped by a stun beam to the arm.}{Stom throws exploding waffles, but the robots deflect them, causing the waffles to backfire and blow up Stom instead.}{Zascub accidentally steps on his remote, fast forwarding the battle to the point where Tappatok has already won.}TAPPATOK #8105: Your efforts are flawed and pitiful. Tappatok is calculated and precise. We cannot fall. TAPPATOK #4388: Should we finish them off? TAPPATOK #8105: We should, but only in the coolest way possible. Let us initiate our new unification protocol and trounce these losers. {The Tappatok robots merge into a singular entity, a towering humanoid robot amalgamation.}TAPPATOK UNITY: As one, we can only be defeated by a similarly gargantuan robot. But you don't have one of those, do you? {gets up, exhausted} Wait a minute... maybe we do. Is it me? No. We can't beat them if we act individually... we must work together like we used to. Come, there's something I need to show you. Is it me? No, we've all seen you before. I'm not sure now is the best time to be showing us something, we're kind of in the midst of world domination and potential imminent death. Unless it's a really cool rock. It's... something along those lines. Come. {Cut to the Hatquarters.} Whoa, that is a cool rock. Come inside, quickly. I'm gonna need all of you for this. {Everyone gathers inside a room with various control panels.} I made the castle out of a malleable nanobot-infused material, so we can change its shape to anything we want. Including a giant robot. But we'll need to coordinate our actions if we hope to stand a chance. I'll be overlooking the logistics and making adjustments to our strategy. Coach E, you control the right arm with that panel over there. Greg, the left. Stom, you'll be in charge of balancing the energy efficiency with that power converter. Whou' bou' me? Right. Gfd. You'll have the most important job of all... uh, standing in the corner over there. It's a very essential role. Wow! I've always wanted to stand in a corner! So what's our giant robot called? We'll decide later. But the most important part of a giant robot is the name! Even more important than the robot itself. This is an urgent matter. Fine, we'll call it, uh, Hatbot. Trite. Cliché. We need something with more punch, something to make our opponents quake with fear, admiration, and incoming notifications set to vibrate. Like, The One True Eternal Colossus Megahelmetbeastviathan 3000-X Created Exclusively For the Punching of Lesser Robots, PhD, XIV, LLC,,. All Rights Reserved, Copyright 20Something (Who I Should Mention is Also Incredibly Cool (TM, Don't Steal Our Cool Name Please, Thank You)). The OTECM3XCEFtPoLRPXLARRC2(WISMiAIC(TMDSOCNPTY))? Yep! That acronym has more letters than even my name, that's how you know it's good! It should be a bit shorter, I think. Maybe Behelmoth? As in, helmet behemoth? I will not allow it unless it has a cool number at the end. Fine, we'll go with Behelmoth 3000. {Cut to the exterior. The castle rises out of the ground, and limbs protrude from it. It eventually morphs into a giant humanoid structure, the same size as Tappatok's.}TAPPATOK UNITY: I've performed an analytical examination of our situational data, and have come to a conclusion that there is a 62.07% chance that we're hosed. {The BODH's voices are spoken through the Behelmoth 3000.} Coach E, hit it with a right hook! Then Greg, you come in with a punch directly to the face! Laser beam is fully charged! Great! Dodge to the side, good, now fire! {The Behelmoth 3000 hits the Tappatok Unity with a giant blast, knocking it over.} Zascub, you know what to do! {The scene fast forwards to the point where the Behelmoth 3000 has already won. It stands triumphantly with its foot resting atop the remains of the Tappatok Unity, before vaporizing it with a laser beam.} Wow. We did it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. None of us could have done it without all of you! I admit, that was... kinda fun. I really enjoyed going on adventures with you all. Who says that needs to be a thing of the past? After that thrilling escapade, I think we should team up again! My corner-standing skills are worthless on their own, but with you guys, we'll be a force to both be reckoned with and stand in corners! You've got a point. All in favor of rejoining the Broternal Order of Different Helmets? ALL: Aye! Then it's settled! We may have one less member, but that won't stop us from being a team again. {Cut to Honstlar wandering through dimensions.}
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Post by Honstlar on Mar 21, 2022 20:48:09 GMT -6
Waddler's Log, Hatdate 49649743: I have been walking for what feels like a billion seconds, and I'm pretty sure I've lost all feeling in my big toes, my right ankle and several of my no-no spots, including but not limited to my porgadon.
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Post by Gfdgsgxgzgdrc on Apr 27, 2022 15:20:33 GMT -6
The search for my universe is a slow one indeed, rife with trial, hardship, and a severe lack of good sandwiches. If only I had a way to speed up my progress... {Another Honstlar appears.}FUTURE HONSTLAR: Wait, say that again. Say what? The sandwich thing? {Yet another Honstlar walks by.}HONSTLAR FROM A FEW SECONDS EARLIER: If only I had a way to speed up my progress... FUTURE HONSTLAR: Of course! It's so simple! What are you suggesting, future self? FUTURE HONSTLAR: We've been lost so long, and have looped around the same point in spacetime on so many occasions, this dimension contains multiple copies of us from throughout our journey. {More Honstlars appear.}PAST HONSTLAR: How does that work? FUTURE HONSTLAR: As you know, time isn't completely linear across all dimensions. In our travels across time and space, we've spent a lot of time walking in circles, retreading the same ground over and over again. Sometimes it's spacial ground, sometimes it's temporal — in this case, it happens to be both. For me, personally, this is about the 78th time I've been to this dimension at this point in time, hence the 77 other Honstlars from the past... which is technically the present. Now I'm more confused than before. FUTURE HONSTLAR: What matters is, there are like a bunch of Honstlars here. If we want to find our homeworld, we should split up and search separately across 78 strings of reality, all the while staying in contact with one another. PAST HONSTLAR: Good idea. We'll do more damage that way. Honstlarmy... search!{The crowd of Honstlars disperses, walking into different portals and through different paths through spacetime.}
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Post by Honstlar on May 23, 2022 17:16:02 GMT -6
(Cut to the King of Town sitting at a table in his castle. He is holding a figurine of himself and a generic princess doll.) (Falsetto) Oh, King of Town, Oh, King of Town, how I've longed for you and your super sweet biceps that you totally have! (Normal voice) You mean the ones that are so big that they cover the ceiling and if you pretend your eyes hard enough they kinda look like Kirk Douglas? (Falsetto) The very same, my love who I'm totally into! I can't wait to kiss them! (Normal voice) As you wish, my quee- (The Poopsmith barges in.) Your majesty, something's happened! WAH! At least knock before you interrupt my pathetic hobbies!
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Post by Gfdgsgxgzgdrc on May 26, 2022 22:44:50 GMT -6
{Cut to the KOT and the Poopsmith walking through the castle halls.} What is it this time? Out of mashed potatoes? Out of corn starch? Or {gasp} a code red... out of mayo?! Not quite. It's probably best that I show you. Why can't you just tell me? Dramatic effect, mostly. Adds a bit of suspense.
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Post by Honstlar on May 26, 2022 23:32:57 GMT -6
Then save the suspense and GET ON WITH IT ALREADY!! Okay, okay! Sheesh, I'm already starting to regret breaking my vow for the umpteenth and final time. What was that? (Nervously) Um, nothing! {Cut to one of the Honstlars appearing in a very familiar landscape.}
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Post by Gfdgsgxgzgdrc on Jun 1, 2022 0:36:23 GMT -6
Could it be...? {he looks around in awe}{Zoom out to reveal Honstlar standing in what appears to be the Field in Free Country, USA.} {speaking into an interdimensional communicator} Other me's, I think I found it! I'm home! {offscreen} Honstlar? Is... is that you? {Gfd and Honstlar run toward each other, and the rest of the BODH join. More Honstlars arrive.} It's been so long since we've seen each other! We thought you died, or at least were really sick of our shenanigans! I'm neither dead nor mostly sick of your shenanigans! I was just lost between dimensions and— FUTURE HONSTLAR: WAIT. Gfd, what did you make me for breakfast on my 20th birthday? Uh, cereal? FUTURE HONSTLAR: We need to get out of here. Fast. What?! Why? We just got here! FUTURE HONSTLAR: I'm from the future, remember? I've been in this situation before. I can't say much, but let's just say... this isn't what it seems.
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Post by Honstlar on Jun 1, 2022 0:40:43 GMT -6
What makes you say that? Is it that slightly off model Bubs? (Cut to a live-action shot of Shark Tooth Bubs.) Shark Tooth Bubs: Slightly? All haves you know this is my... regular face. (Cut back to Gfd and the Honstlars.) Or is it the army of Tappatoks charging at us- OH MY FLOD, TAPPATOK IS BACK!!!!!!!
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Post by Gfdgsgxgzgdrc on Jun 11, 2022 22:12:12 GMT -6
Oh no! Attack positions, everyone! {The BODH bands together to fight Tappatok.}TAPPATOK: You will never defeat us! Yes, we will! {They fight, and BODH emerges victorious.} A hard-fought battle won by us, the Broternal Order of Different Helmets. You see, Honstlar? You're perfectly safe here. No... something about this isn't right. Is Grindolo behind this? Grindolo's dead, remember? You have nothing to fear, Honstlar. This is your world, and you can stay here with us, forever, and ever, and ever. Please join us, Honstlar. Become one of us, Honstlar. We will never leave you, Honstlar. You guys make a pretty good point. It's great to be back! FUTURE HONSTLAR: You can't let them convince you. Don't make the same mistake I did... PAST HONSTLAR: I'm agreeing with futurem'n over here. Something's real fishy here. ANOTHER PAST HONSTLAR: What are you talking about? Everything seems perfectly fine! I am Gfdgsgxgzgdrc, and I like to eat food items. Allow me to demonstrate. {eats a cracker}ANOTHER PAST HONSTLAR: See? Classic Gfd, always eating food items.
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Post by Honstlar on Jun 11, 2022 22:41:22 GMT -6
Wait just a cotton-swabbing minute... Gfd doesn't know how to pronounce his name! This place is a trap!
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Post by Gfdgsgxgzgdrc on Jun 13, 2022 0:44:42 GMT -6
Did I say Gfdgsgxgzgdrc? I meant Guh. PAST HONSTLAR: Now there's the Gfd that I know. Now who wants ice cream? Hmm... this place may be a trap, but it does have ice cream. It can't be so bad, can it? ANOTHER PAST HONSTLAR: Good point. Ice cream for all! ALL HONSTLARS: Huzzah! {Cut back to the King of Town and the Poopsmith at the castle. The Poopsmith is looking at a computer screen.} Okay, it's been five minutes. That's enough suspense, right? Almost. One more dramatic pause should do the trick. {Dramatic pause.} There we go. Great, now tell me why you interrupted my very important kinging business! First off... are you familiar with the concept of parallel worlds?
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Post by Honstlar on Jun 13, 2022 1:08:04 GMT -6
Is this about that speed-running crap again? No, I said worlds, not universes. Oh, my mistake, continue.
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Post by Gfdgsgxgzgdrc on Jun 14, 2022 21:16:43 GMT -6
{The BODH come in.} Perhaps it's best if you let us explain. Oh, of course. Continue. As you're no doubt aware due to the whole interdimensional battle you participated in about a year ago, our world is one of many. We exist among other universes, each with their own dimensions and higher planes of existence... to put it simply, reality is pretty big. We've been keeping an eye on alternate worlds to see if Honstlar's out there anywhere... And did you find him? No, but we've confirmed there exists a world that appears to be identical to this one in nearly every way. So if, hypothetically, Honstlar did survive the collapse of our old universe, the most likely outcome is that he's in this identical world. I see. And does this involve food in any way? Not really, no. Why tell me this then?!
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Post by Honstlar on Jun 20, 2022 23:28:48 GMT -6
Because we simply don't have the time to scour through every alternate universe to find it, and you have two proverbial scoops of Poopertroopers ready to fulfill your every whim!
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Post by Gfdgsgxgzgdrc on Jun 21, 2022 21:40:55 GMT -6
You're right! I'll send them out there to find that purple thing, wherever he may or may not be. {Cut to Honstlar in what appears to be a BODH meeting.} Ever and more, ever and more, ever and more! And so begins this meeting of the Broternal Order of Different Helmets, this club we're in. We will go down the items on our schedule, one by one, and do the aforementioned items. Good idea, unusually coherent Dooble. {holds up a schedule} First up, we've got an art trade! Who wants to do some drawing? I volunteer. All right, you draw, um... a wagon fulla pancakes... as an astronaut! Good plan, Honstlar. You may draw a void of collapsed worlds wraught with the scourge of everlasting insanity. Uh, sure, that's a perfectly normal-sounding request if I ever heard one. Now let's start drawing! {Honstlar begins scribbling on a page. A black tendril emerges from Coach E's face, shrieking as it tears a hole in reality and pulls out Honstlar's requested drawing.} That's, uh, different from how I remember you drawing. It is perfectly normal. Adjust to this world, Honstlar, it is your own and always will be. Um... let's move onto the next thing on the schedule. Let's do some collaborative storytelling! Greg, you start. Our world is a real one. We are not illusory beings brought forth from the memory of omnipotence. That's a weird way to start a story.
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Post by Honstlar on Jun 22, 2022 21:07:41 GMT -6
Future Honstlar: That's because IT ISN'T ONE! CAN'T YOU SEE THEY'RE TRYING TO ERASE ME- I MEAN US FROM EXISTENCE WITH THEIR WEIRD CTHULHU TENTACLES?!? AM I THE ONLY SANE ONE HERE?!?!?!?
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Post by Gfdgsgxgzgdrc on Jun 24, 2022 22:56:40 GMT -6
We are not trying to erase anyone from existence. We are regular, normal, everyday, average, completely real organisms. Yeah, see? They're real, normal organisms. What's suspicious about that? {Future Honstlar whacks Gfd with a baseball bat. Gfd collapses into a pulsating cosmic void.} AAH! GFD! {to his future self} What did you just do?! FUTURE HONSTLAR: I revealed his true form! PAST HONSTLAR: I don't see anything wrong here. Gfd's all the time turning into cosmic voids. THE REST OF THE BODH: {speaking simultaneously} YOU HAVE BETRAYED US. BE PREPARED TO FACE THE CONSEQUENCES. PAST HONSTLAR: Heh, that's the BODH for you. Always speaking ominous phrases in unison, right, guys? {Reality slowly unravels, revealing a dark, twisted realm underneath, seeping with dark energy.}PAST HONSTLAR: Wait, they were fake?! Who could have possibly predicted this?
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Post by Honstlar on Jun 24, 2022 23:25:31 GMT -6
Future Honstlar: GRAAAAAAAGHH! {Future Honstlar hits Past Honstlar with the bat, who also turns into a cosmic void.} Future Honstlar: Huh, guess he was more convincing than the others. What do we do? WHAT DO WE DO?!?
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